It’s almost Thanksgiving, a time for naming our blessings and sharing gratitude for all we have.

This year, I’m giving thanks for something a bit unusual.

I’m giving thanks for my “too-muchness.” As in, my too direct, too sensitive, too dramatic, too emotional, too-much self.

Here’s why.

When we allow ourselves to appreciate our too-muchness, without shame and insecurity, we discover what psychotherapist and author, Ken Page, calls our Core Gifts.  

I call it our special sauce and one of the WHYs for being on the planet.

But wait. How can something that we’ve spent our lives being ashamed of also be the BEST THING about us? 

Let me show you.

First, what happens when we’re told we’re too much?

We immediately shut down that part of ourselves, right? We judge it, we hide it, we overcompensate, and we generally do our best to be anything but THAT!

But when we know these insecurities are really pointers toward our Core Gifts, we can appreciate them.

We can give thanks that our too-muchness is not a condemnation but an invitation! 

Let me get personal.

All my life I’ve been told I’m too intense, but really that’s just a pointer to my Core Gift of Passion.

My other pointers /gifts are:
too direct = truth teller
too emotional = deep feeling
too sensitive = empathic
too assertive = clear-seeing

Recently, in retreat, I had a eureka moment. 

I realized that my gift of Deep Feeling fuels my desire to express emotional truth.

This is why I write and why I guide women to their emotional truth through coaching. 

Knowing that these are my Core Gifts clarifies my purpose and turbo-charges my confidence. Most importantly, it frees me from the weight of shame.

Indeed, Page says, “our biggest mistakes, our most self-sabotaging behaviors were simply convulsive, unskilled attempts to express the deepest parts of ourselves.”

So, go ahead. Which “too-muchness” are you ready to own as your Core Gift?