There’s a classic business book by Marshall Goldsmith titled, “What Got You Here, Won’t Get You There.”

Do you know it?

In it, he helps business leaders learn what to STOP doing so they can get better at knowing what to START doing.  It’s an intriguing concept.

If you want to feel more purposeful and have more impact in the world, can you recognize how some of the habits that helped you along the way might now be getting IN the way?

I call those habits, default energy.

In my work with high-achieving women, default energy usually shows up as some form of pleasing, proving, and perfectionism. 

The telltale signs of which are overwhelm, confusion, and resentment.

Here’s the #1 mistake I see women leaders make. 

What you think is the problem, isn’t actually the problem.

Allow me to demonstrate.

Oftentimes, when our life feels sticky and hard, many of us double down on our old strategies: try harder, work more, be better. 

We also look for solutions that are well-intentioned but just treat the symptoms:

  • If I could just relax a little more
  • All I need is a good night’s sleep, a vacation, or a day off
  • I just need a few good days of healthy eating
  • If only I could work out more consistently, get the kids settled, make more money…

Sound familiar?

Of course it does. 

But fixing and grasping is just more default energy. What you need is a new approach, and a new energy. 

Start with these questions:

  • What would I love?
  • Why is that important to me?
  • What is it costing me to not have that in my life right now?
  • Who would I get to be if that was in my life?
  • What qualities does that future me possess and how can I express those qualities now?

Sounds simple, doesn’t it?

As one of my mentors says, it’s simple, not easy!

If you’re seeing yourself in any of this, let’s have a no-obligation phone call to help you gain a little more clarity. Schedule a time here.